Different Types of Parenting Styles

Parenting styles play an intrinsic role in how a child develops. It also heavily influences family dynamics and the parent-child bond. Many factors come into play about the “right” or “best” parenting style — including child temperament, cultural influences, and the resources you have as a parent. That said, understanding the types of parenting styles can help you identify the areas you want to embrace and those you might consider changing. 

Four primary parenting styles are widely recognized, alongside several less common approaches. The most common styles of parenting include:

• Authoritative parenting: This style combines high expectations with responsiveness and warmth. It often leads to children who excel both socially and academically. However, the high expectations can sometimes be stressful for children.
• Authoritarian parenting: Characterized by strict rules and high demands, this approach may foster obedience and discipline. However, it can also inhibit social competence and lead to lower self-esteem in children.
• Permissive parenting: With minimal demands and a lack of structure, this relaxed approach can foster creativity and independence. However, it may also lead to challenges in self-discipline and responsibility.
• Uninvolved parenting: This style features low involvement and few demands, which can encourage self-sufficiency in some cases. However, it often results in children struggling with self-esteem, confidence, and academic achievement.

While authoritative parenting is often advised by professionals, there are reasons why parents might fall into the other three styles. Authoritarian parenting might stem from cultural norms or a belief in the importance of strict discipline. Permissive parenting can arise from a desire to foster a close, affectionate relationship without conflict. Uninvolved parenting might result from external stressors, mental health issues, or a lack of parenting knowledge or resources.

Below, we’ll explore each of these parenting styles in detail, along with other less common types of parenting.

4 Main Types of Parenting

Parenting styles influence everything about the family structure. They can impact child development, the relationships parents have with their children, the relationships children have with peers and others, and the adult relationships they’ll one day form. 

Understanding the different types of parenting skills and styles can help you navigate the complexity of raising children. It can also help you adapt your approach to suit your children’s and the family’s needs.

1. Authoritative parenting

High responsiveness and high demands on children best characterize the authoritative parenting style. Authoritative parents are very clear in their expectations and rules for their children, but they’re also very quick to show warmth, support, and love. Research suggests authoritative-style parenting is linked to the most favorable child development outcomes, including academic success and overall mental well-being. 

Characteristics of authoritative parenting include:

• High expectations for behavior
• High demands for performance
• Clear, consistent, communicated rules
• Promotion of self-discipline
• Open communication and active listening
• Encourage independence
• Warm and supportive environment

Example of authoritative parenting

An authoritative parent would have a known, set curfew for their teen child. It would be non-negotiable at the moment — meaning a child would have to honor their set curfew — but the parent would be willing to calmly explain their reasoning and be open to listening to a child’s request to adjust the curfew time based on the child’s level of maturity and responsibility.

“Understanding the different styles of parenting helps to guide new parents with what will be best for their lives and children. The authoritative parent works to find the balance between discipline and compromise. When parents are active in discussing the logic behind the boundaries put forth and why consequences are put forth, it allows children to understand personal responsibility and autonomy as they grow and mature.”

– Talkspace therapist Minkyung Chung, MS, LMHC

Impact of authoritative parenting

Children who grow up with authoritative parents tend to be obedient but happy. Thanks to the authoritative parenting style, they are usually competent students and successful in school. They tend to have healthy social skills and self-regulation and generally develop high self-esteem and a good sense of self-worth.

2. Authoritarian parenting

Authoritarian parenting is defined by high demands and low responsiveness. Authoritarian parents often enforce strict rules and have very high expectations of their children. Parents with this style demand obedience, often without offering much warmth or feedback, focusing instead on discipline over dialogue.

Characteristics of authoritarian parenting include:

• Stringent rules
• Inflexible
• Expect obedience with no discussion
• Show little warmth or nurturing
• Demand compliance and high-performance
• Heavy-handed discipline methods

Example of authoritarian parenting

An authoritarian parent may demand perfect grades and strictly enforce high expectations. Children who fail to meet these standards may face severe punishment, typically without consideration for extenuating circumstances or an opportunity for discussion. For example, if a child does poorly on a test, they may restrict leisure activities. This approach offers minimal emotional support or understanding, focusing more on compliance than nurturing.

Impact of authoritarian parenting

Authoritarian parents have a significant impact on their children. While these children often exhibit obedience and academic proficiency, they typically face challenges with self-esteem and social skills. Moreover, they are prone to experiencing elevated levels of stress and anxiety.

“While authoritarian parenting may be helpful for certain situations, it can create some unhealthy behaviors in children. Children raised in a strictly authoritarian household often struggle with expressing themselves, have emotional dysregulation, and struggle in social settings, to name a few. There may be times when strictness and one way communication is necessary, but a constant stream of it can be harmful for the child.”

– Talkspace therapist Minkyung Chung, MS, LMHC

3. Permissive parenting

Permissive parenting features a relaxed approach. Parents have low demands yet remain highly responsive to their children’s needs. These parents often adopt a lenient attitude, aiming to minimize confrontation and foster an open, communicative environment. Permissive parents typically act more like friends than authority figures, emphasizing a supportive rather than disciplinary role in their children’s lives.

Characteristics of permissive parenting include:

• Very few rules
• Minimal expectations
• Discipline isn’t enforced
• Highly nurturing and communicative
• Emphasis on the child’s freedom and sense of autonomy
• Is responsive to the child’s needs and wants

Example of permissive parenting

If a child forgets to do their homework, a permissive parent might respond with understanding rather than consequences. They might say, “It’s okay, just try to remember next time,” and help them complete the assignment without addressing the need for better habits. A permissive household often focuses on empathy and support over establishing rules or expectations for behavior.

Impact of permissive parenting

Without consistent guidelines, children might struggle with self-discipline and authority, potentially facing issues with behavior and academic performance. This parenting style can leave children ill-prepared to navigate structured settings and make responsible decisions, ultimately affecting their long-term growth and success.

4. Uninvolved parenting

Uninvolved parenting is as hands-off as it gets. Characterized by minimal responsiveness and negligible demands, parents adopting this style typically provide very little guidance, nurturing, or attention, leaving children to navigate much of their upbringing on their own.

In households with uninvolved parenting, the parent may often be absent, showing little interest in the child’s daily experiences. They seldom inquire about the child’s schoolwork, friends, or social activities and are typically absent from games and practices. Their involvement is limited to providing just the essentials needed for survival, without active participation in the child’s emotional or social development.

Characteristics of uninvolved parenting include:

• Lack of consistent rules
• Little to no expectations
• Minimal communication
• Showing little interest 
• Being emotionally detached
• Lacking warmth
• Basic needs are met, but not much beyond is given

Example of uninvolved parenting

If a child is struggling with a particular subject in school and expresses their difficulty, an uninvolved parent might simply acknowledge the statement without offering support or solutions. For instance, they might respond with a nonchalant, ‘Okay, try to figure it out,’ showing no engagement in the child’s academic challenges or interest in helping them seek tutoring or additional resources.

Impact of uninvolved parenting

Uninvolved parenting typically results in children being fearful and anxious. Some children develop abandonment issues as a result of growing up with uninvolved parents. They can be emotionally withdrawn, perform poorly in school, commonly have low self-esteem, and struggle with social competence now and in the future.

Lesser-Known Parenting Styles

Beyond the 4 traditional parenting styles, various lesser-known approaches to raising children exist. Exploring these can provide crucial insights to enhance your child’s development and overall well-being.

Gentle parenting

Gentle parenting focuses on respect, empathy, and understanding the child’s experience. It revolves around promoting positive discipline without punishment. Gentle parenting would mean calmly discussing misbehavior by talking about choices instead of using punishment as a consequence. These parents may refrain from using the word “no.”

Impact: Gentle parenting can positively impact children, fostering empathy and establishing solid emotional connections. However, it can also lead to challenges if children struggle with boundaries or authority because clear limits still need to be established. 

Attachment parenting

Attachment parenting centers on creating and nurturing a powerful emotional bond between parent and child. Close physical and emotional connections and ultra-responsiveness are used in daily interactions. Parents who use the attachment style might co-sleep, breastfeed longer than others, and respond immediately to crying. 

Impact: Attachment parenting cultivates a strong emotional parent-child bond and, as the name implies, a secure attachment, which is generally a positive thing. That said, much like gentle parenting, children raised in a home where attachment parenting is used might have difficulties setting boundaries later in life. 

Free-range parenting

A parent who uses the free-range parenting style encourages their children to become independent. They let them explore and take risks within safe boundaries. Free-range parents may let a child walk to school on their own, and they’d trust them to follow safety rules and be responsible.

Impact: Free-range parenting encourages children to develop problem-solving skills and a sense of independence, but it can also make it difficult for them to set boundaries with friends. Without limits or supervision, they might engage in risky behavior. 

Helicopter parenting

Helicopter parenting describes parents who hover over their children. They pay close attention to supervision and offer little freedom or autonomy. These parents have no problem intervening in their child’s life and will go to great lengths to avoid potential harm. They also strive to reduce the chance of their children experiencing failure. Helicopter parents often email teachers and step in to resolve issues without letting their child navigate conflict on their own.

Impact: Children with helicopter parents may feel supported and loved, but the level of support and hovering they receive could lead to an unhealthy dependency and inability to self-advocate when they need to. Or the children may rebel against the tight surveillance and control.

Cultural Variations in Parenting Styles

Parents can be influenced by their cultural background. Cultural expectations often shape a family unit’s attitudes and dictate the kinds of parenting a parent uses. For example, in collectivist cultures, where harmony and community are the norm, parents may inherently adopt an authoritarian approach to their role. Individualist cultures, on the other hand, value independence and personal achievement. An authoritative parenting style might feel more natural for parents raised in this environment. 

Cultural norms may also depend on factors like gender, social status, and education levels. Understanding cultural differences can be beneficial and give parents an understanding of how diverse the practice of raising children is. Exploring these variations can offer insight into how parenting styles might be adapted to fit societal norms and expectations.

Adapting Parenting Styles

Parenting isn’t a one-size-fits-all deal. Adapting styles to meet your children’s needs is possible, and doing so can foster the healthiest and most supportive environment for everyone. For example, single moms or dads may find that blending elements of various styles helps them manage the dual roles of nurturer and disciplinarian effectively. Being flexible in your parenting style helps you become more aware and responsive so you can develop a style that reflects the needs of each child’s unique personality.

You can adapt your style by:

• Understanding your child’s temperament
• Assessing your family dynamics
• Being informed and open to new ideas
• Remaining consistent but flexible
• Focusing on the emotional connection between you and your child

Find Support with Parenting Styles

Parenting is a deeply personal experience. Your parenting style is intrinsically linked with how your child develops. Each traditional style — authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved — is distinct and directly impacts your child’s development and well-being. 

The authoritative parent typically has happy and successful children. The authoritarian parent often sees children become obedient but have low self-esteem. Permissive parenting can result in children who struggle with authority and self-discipline. Finally, uninvolved parenting can lead to children becoming emotionally withdrawn and struggling academically.

Effective parenting isn’t about being perfect. It’s about finding a balance that works for you and your children and always being willing and open to growing and changing. The good news is it’s always possible to become a better parent. With guidance, you can adapt your parenting style where needed. Individual therapy and support can be instrumental in assessing and changing your behavior. Talkspace can be a resource as you learn and develop your parenting style.

Reach out to Talkspace to learn more about convenient, accessible, and affordable online therapy. Get online support from a Talkspace therapist today.